Your child is scared to sleep alone or nervous about tomorrow’s school trip—sound familiar? If you’re a parent navigating the ups and downs of childhood anxiety, you’re far from alone. Anxiety in kids is more common than many realize, and while it can be overwhelming for the child, it can also leave parents feeling helpless and unsure of what to do.
The good news? With the right support and a little creativity, you can help your child move from worry to courage. Think of this as your parenting “playbook”—filled with gentle, effective, and even fun strategies to help your anxious child feel calmer and more in control.
Understanding Childhood Anxiety
Children experience anxiety in many forms: fears of separation, social anxiety, excessive worry about school or making mistakes, fear of the dark, childhood trauma or even irrational phobias. Unlike adults, kids often can’t explain what’s bothering them. Instead, they might act out, avoid things, complain of stomachaches, or cry without an obvious reason.
These behaviors are often signs of an overwhelmed nervous system—not misbehavior or defiance. Your role as a parent isn’t to eliminate their anxiety, but to teach them how to manage it and build emotional resilience over time.
Your Playbook: Simple Coping Skills for Kids with Anxiety
Here are practical, parent-approved coping tools that can be used at home, in the car, before bedtime, or during any anxious moment. The goal is to equip your child with calming habits while also empowering you to be a soothing guide.
1. Belly Breathing for Bedtime Worries
When kids are anxious, their breathing often becomes shallow, which can make their body feel even more stressed. Teach them “belly breathing” to calm their nervous system.
How to do it:
- Place one hand on the belly and the other on the chest.
- Breathe in through the nose for a count of four, filling the belly like a balloon.
- Hold for one count, then breathe out slowly through the mouth for a count of four.
- Repeat 3–5 times, especially before bed or during a stressful moment.
Make it fun by using a stuffed animal—have them lie down with their favorite toy on their belly and watch it rise and fall as they breathe.
2. The Worry Journal
Anxious thoughts can swirl in a child’s mind and grow bigger when they’re not expressed. Writing them down—or drawing them—helps release them.
How to do it:
- Set aside 5–10 minutes a day (preferably before bed) as “worry time.”
- Use a dedicated notebook for your child to draw or write their worries.
- Afterward, close the journal together and say, “We’ve given those worries a place to live that’s not in your head.”
You can even make a ritual of storing the journal in a “worry box” to show that those fears don’t need to follow them around.
3. Use a Comfort Object as a Brave Buddy
If your child has a favorite stuffed animal or toy, turn it into a coping tool.
How to do it:
- Have the toy “practice” brave behaviors with your child.
- Say things like, “Teddy is scared to go to school, too—but he’s going to try it today, and you can help him.”
- Celebrate small wins with the toy: “Teddy did great today—and so did you!”
This form of imaginative play helps externalize anxiety and builds your child’s sense of agency.
4. Name the Feeling
Giving anxiety a name helps kids identify and talk about it. You can even turn it into a game.
How to do it:
- Ask, “What should we call that nervous feeling? Maybe ‘Wiggle Monster’ or ‘Buzz Brain’?”
- Once it’s named, say, “Looks like Wiggle Monster is back. What should we do to help him calm down?”
This makes emotions feel manageable—not mysterious—and encourages emotional intelligence.
5. Create a Bravery Chart
Tracking and rewarding brave behaviors—no matter how small—reinforces progress and boosts confidence.
How to do it:
- Make a colorful chart with stickers or markers.
- Set simple goals like “Went to school without crying” or “Tried something new.”
- Offer small rewards or praise for each success.
This keeps the focus on effort, not perfection.
Parent Coaching: You’re Part of the Solution
One of the most powerful tools in your child’s journey is you. Kids are wired to look to their parents for cues on how safe or dangerous the world is. If you meet their anxiety with calm confidence, it signals that they can handle hard feelings.
Here’s what helps:
- Validate their feelings: “It’s okay to be scared. That happens to everyone.”
- Stay calm (even when you feel worried): Take a breath, and keep your voice steady.
- Model coping skills: Say, “I’m feeling stressed, so I’m going to take a few deep breaths.”
You don’t have to have all the answers. Just showing up with love and patience makes a huge difference.
When to Seek Professional Support
If your child’s anxiety is interfering with daily life—such as avoiding school, struggling to sleep, or experiencing frequent meltdowns—it might be time to seek help.
At Resilient Mind Psychotherapy, we offer child-friendly therapy, including CBT-based coping skills, art therapy, and parent coaching in Brooklyn and online. Our therapists specialize in working with children and families to build emotional resilience in safe, playful, and effective ways.
Final Thoughts
Helping your child manage anxiety doesn’t mean eliminating their worries. It means teaching them that they can feel scared—and still show up with courage. With your support, a few kid-friendly coping tools, and lots of encouragement, your child can move from anxious to empowered.
Every small act of bravery counts—and every child has it in them.
